Play Scripts

Spiffing Japes by 'A Bloke'
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SynopsisWe are taken to St Trollops in the Field in 1934, a private Boarding School for young ladies of excellence. But its a place of whispered secrets, of foreboding, of inedible food. Indeed St Trollops is an enigma... with a mystery, that no one, but no one is allowed to discuss.The very mention of 'the incident' is immediately punished or worse still, frowned upon. The merest suggestion of the question hangs persistently in the air however...' What really happened to all of the first years?' Did they get lost on a nature ramble, or sprout wings and fly south for the winter.. or did Matron get them? Simone Parmentier-Standish; following in a well established family tradition is starting her first year, only to find her single qualification is the fact she has a hyphen in her name. St Trollops boasts an agoraphobic Head Mistress, a true party member Ayrian Frau for a German teacher, an Hungarian groundsman who prides himself on being mistaken for Lon Shanie and a Head Girl for Sports Brian Andrews, who might possibly be a conscientious objector and draft dodger from the "Twattington End Pals Regiment 1916"
InformationSuitable for under 16s to performMild SwearingComedyHistoricalFarce
Cast4 (M) 10-100 (F) (minimum 15)
Simone Parmentier-Standish (child 13) Simone Parmentier-Standish (80 year's old) Camile Smith (child 14) Yoghurty Lome-Fitter (girl 18) Angela Fridgid-Bromide-Smythe (18+) Brian Andrews (late 30's pipe, tashe, clearly a bloke) Rampling (50's possibly) The Chaps (5 sixth formers) The Reliable Sorts Club (numerous) Frau ParteiGlšubiger (30+) Matron The Grim Reaper (50+) Mavis Beige-Roughly (60+ Head) Lettice Three-Shillings-Rovington-Pencil (15 girl, upper class idiot) Millicent Petticoat-Witheredvine-Rustic (15 girl, upper class idiot) Jennifer Hinterland-Feeling-Mulch (15 girl, upper class idiot) Others
ProductionTheatre or radio
StatusAvailable for performance
Not Currently Available: (for other licences please contact the Author)
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A pathological writer of humour, usually inspired by factual events. Failed puberty and not making a very good job of being a 'man on pause' either.

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